Robot Gospel, Intermission xi
Okay, time to tackle a very serious issue facing the political discourse of the day: JD Vance having fucked a couch.
Now, I can confidently say that most people probably don’t really believe that is true. But it is funny to say and make memes about and the whole thing.
Now, there are a lot of people on Trump’s side who have been attacking Kamala Harris for ridiculous, racist, misogynistic reasons, so isn’t this just lowering yourself to their level?
No. First of all, the attacks against Harris are just that: Attacks. Questioning if she is even technically an American citizen and can be President was something that was also done to Barrack Obama because they both are obviously Not White. Super fucking racist — especially since that question was not raised when John McCain ran for President and was actually, physically born in Panama!
Also claims that she has only gotten to where she is because of Diversity Equity and Inclusion initiatives are meant to question her being qualified for any job she has had up to and including now. The implication being that women and people who are not White are never as qualified as White dudes in consideration for the same job. If you aren’t a default human being, then how could you possibly be as good as one?
But this is delving into to realm of sexuality, and aren’t all you godless heathens about not “kink shaming” and supporting the LGBT and the rest of the alphabet?
Well, if he actually did it, that might have to be taken into consideration, and you can’t really prove the negative of something, so...
And again, this is another attack route that Republicans are taking with Harris, saying that she had to have given sexual favors in order to achieve all that she had in her career. Because obviously, women can’t be qualified for jobs that don’t include being a mother or caretaker.
Trump is a full-blown rapist and sexual assailant. That’s truth and not up for debate. It’s nothing to do with sexual interest, it’s all about status and power. Trump holds status and power as paragons of masculinity above all else. Being tough and hurting other people just proves how much of an important man you are.
If you’re someone who’s fucked a couch, though... That’s something a loser would do. Someone who can’t get a woman through charm, coercion, or force has to result to something like that. Someone like that is a loser — one of Trump’s own favorite put-downs. You don’t fit in with the toxic masculine ideal, therefore you aren’t powerful, therefore you cannot lead.
And associating with someone weaker than you does make you look stronger in comparison, but it also says something about you if that is the kind of person you have chosen to share your power with. It belies an insecurity and may also call into question your judgement.
That is what I believe should be the intention of the couch fucker rhetoric. Highlighting the vileness that Trump represents. Keeping the conversation focused on his sex crimes. This isn’t about Vance at all (he’s an overcooked, soggy noodle anyway) — it’s about Trump, who you can’t really face head-on.
It’s an idea that he represents. The specter of fascism. The spirit of hate and ignorance that needs to be exorcised from the soul of America. The picture that I’m getting of Trump’s would be assassin is that he was an accelerationist seeking to turn Trump into a martyr in the eyes, hearts, and deranged minds of the most far-gone of MAGA stalwarts. Taking him out of the picture in order to stoke the flames of incendiary rhetoric and loose the coiled tight hatred as shrapnel in an explosion of violence.
The orange tinted glasses — not the unclothed would-be emperor — are what need to be removed. And if there’s one thing that that Trump is an expert at, is tanking his own businesses.
I experimented on this one with the new native Substack iPhone app post creator. It’s not that great, to be honest. It could be worse (like trying to use FireFox on my phone to create posts). Hopefully it gets better...
Anyway, here’s a video from Pom Pom Squad from the long awaited (at least by me) new album.